Any Old Excuse Will Do...

I haven't written since October and I have many excuses. Mom's cancer diagnosis and ongoing recovery, the 2nd anniversary of Britt's death, church work, conferences, the loss of a special friend in our lives, travel and holiday furor are all good reasons to be too busy to write. But none are good enough to bear the weight of me not writing.

I have missed sitting here sharing my heart. I love the process of birthing the words, the sentence structures, the thoughts and incessant ramblings that are always in my head. I guess that is the creative part of me, that is always pushing, always forcing itself to be heard, if only in my imagination.

When I finally take the time to write, I find time to embrace my thoughts, discover new ideas and then try painfully to write it all eloquently. (Hopefully all you readers out there can understand me.) Then I try to get it all down before I lose it all. It's fun but I find myself racing against this clock that is always ticking, forcing me to hurry. Maybe that is why it has been a struggle. But I'm going to put all those distractions away and write anyway.
I hope that you will be there to share this labor of love.
Blessings,
Melodie

Just A Simple Reminder

As I was looking at my blog, I struggled as I considered my blogging options. I must admit, when I see that I haven't written in days, the weight of writer's guilt overwhelms me. I want to do better, but with my schedule and my daily tasks, I am amazed that I remember to take a shower. There are so many things that are in my spirit that I want to share. I can't write them all TODAY, but I recognize the fact that I should write something.

As I struggled, the Holy Spirit sent me a writer's prompt. It was just a simple reminder. It happened so quickly as I was looking over the blog. I glanced at the faith quotes located on the top left of the page. I placed these quotes there to remind us all of the importance of faith. (You can't walk in "Big Shoes" without faith.) With so many famous people having spoken about faith, surely we can gain something that will empower us in our daily walk.

Well today was my day. I love how the Holy Spirit knows just what you need and when you need it. I looked over and there was the quote for Saint Augustine that stated:

Faith is to believe what you do not see;

The REWARD of this faith is to see what you believe.

I'm a minister and I have preached and taught about faith many times over. And yes, I know that this quote from Saint Augustine is just a old ("new") twist on Hebrews 11:1. But isn't it wonderful to know that God sees when you are going through and He sends you a quote from a man who has been dead for over 1700 years to remind you of HIS faithfulness.

I don't know about you but recently I felt as if I was up against a wall. With my mother's recent's diagnosis and upcoming surgery, my physical weariness from doctor's visit's and consultations, the pressures of homelife, church and community, the yo-yo effect of the economy, concerns for friend's prayer requests and my role of caretaker of two wonderful senior citizens, plus this innate desire to write a book and no time to write it, well faith seem to be the furthest thing I can focus on today.

Isn't that like many of you? We tend to focus on what's wrong instead of the "absolute possibility" that God is going to show up. We strategically place God in the "Maybe He will help today" column and instead worry about our cares and frustrations. I know God sometimes looks down during those times and says, "Beloved, where is your faith?" Let's be honest, sometimes it is so hard. It is hard to trust God when it seems like you are alone in this life and nothing is working out. There have been times (especialy when I faced the fact that I had to deal with cancer again and it has only been 20 months since Britt's death) that I wanted to run and get under my heavy blanket and stay there until everything is over.

But let me say this to all of you. God wants us to be adult about the situation. (Don't you hate that?) He wants us to be a faith filled people even when it is hard. He wants us to believe what we don't see. That my sisters and brothers require a mind-set change. We must change the way we look at things. We must change the way we analyze things and yes, we must change the way we react to things. Still the bottom of line is, will we believe that God can get us out of our present dilemma when it looks like He's NOT going to do it today? Can we still be faith filled people? Can we remain is a calm state although that check didn't come today or we didn't get the job?

Can we believe it although we can't see it?

I want to answer for you and say yes! Just believe and before you know it, you will get the reward. Maybe not today. Maybe not at the exact moment you feel like you need it most. But God always shows up when it seems like ALL the chips are down and there is no where to turn. God manifests His grace that empowers us to abound in ALL things... and "all" means ALL.

Believing even when we can't see is hard. Trusting God, when it seems like there is no way out is HARD. Trusting God, when you want to hide is HARD. Trusting God when it seems like those closest to you are the farthest away is HARD.

Hebrews 11:1a says it like this, "Now faith is the substance of things hoped for...

What are you hoping for today? A miracle? A mortgage payment? A rekindled love that been gone for awhile? Maybe it a financial breakthrough or a college tuition payment. The requests are endless but the reward of believing what you don't see now will be the manifestation of seeing what you have believed.

Just let that simmer in your spirit. I wanted to share this simple reminder. Remember there is nothing too hard for God.

Now, can you believe that?

Blessings,

Melodie

Oh That He Would Hide Me

Waiting in the patient's waiting room, I had a case of deja vu. While my mom tried to digest 1000cc of contrast which was faintly disguised as Crystal Light Lemonade, I listened to the sounds around me. As I sat there, I heard a small child in distress, crying hysterically and I just sat there and my eyes burned with tears. I wanted to run and comfort this child who I did not know. This child, was probably afraid, because x-ray rooms can be dark and scary. Yet, I was remembering my own fears as I has waited with Britt years ago. But I wasn't here with her. I was here with my Mom, trying to be a comfort, a place of safety.

But while we waited, I was remembering being in another small room at Duke University Hospital and listening to all the tired sick children cry as they waited for a CT scan. The flashbacks came and danced before my mind and I longed to look across the room and see Britt waiting for her turn. Instead, I remembered where I was and why I was here. I remembered my mother and her cancerous polyp and I thought about the possible results.

Oh that He would hide me in the secret place...

In the 21 months since she has been gone, I've journeyed to new places in faith so the remembering doesn't keep my stomach in knots anymore. Now I worry about Mom losing her balance; Mom being taken care of by tired hospital staff and fretting about Mom being able to withstand the rigors of possible treatment.

Oh that He would hide me in the secret place...

But as I sat there, I simply exhaled and I smile at my Mom. We engage in casual conversation and I want her to know that she is safe. Still she wants to make sure that I am warm and okay. She is always the Mom. But as I confront my own discomfort and the place where I find myself, I simply remember I've done this before. God was with me then and God is with me now. I thought to myself as she glanced at an old National Geographic magazine, when we leave this place, we are going to take the long way home so she can enjoy the trees, the birds and all the different people she sees on the street.

The technician came to get her and off the two of them went. I prayed as they left the room. I sat and read the latest book that I had in my purse. I looked at her contrast and cup and noticed that she had drunk it all. Not a whimper, nor a complaint. She always just did what she had to do. I buried myself in the book and I looked up and there was my Mom and the nice CT technician. She's all through, he said as he brought her walker in front of me. "She's finished?", I asked in astonishment. Well, she wasn't back there 15 minutes. When Britt had a CT she was back there for 45 minutes to an hour sometimes two. I gathered her things, we journeyed to the front of the hospital and I got her in the car.

What this a good thing or a bad thing? But instead of fretting about it, I decided to pray. We journeyed home and Mom and I talked about the change of the season and the beautiful color of the fall leaves. She loves that kind of thing. She talked about trees that I had never heard of and the onset of the fall season. (I tell you, the woman should have been a botanist.) That conversation carried us all the way home where Mom got settled in her routine and I talked to my husband. This time I didn't call my cousin in NY. I decided to wait until we heard something.

Although I walked this walk before, I was going to trust God to bring Mommy out. No matter how many times I reflected on Britt's journey with cancer, I also knew that Mom was not Britt. Britt was diagnosed with Stage 4 metastatic cancer at the age of twelve. Mom had a cancerous polyp and she was 86 years old. Not the same scenario.

While we waited on the results in the days that followed, I began to pray for Mom's health more and more. Thanking God for his hedge of protection around her, I rested and worked on church work. God is so faithful and as I allowed him to hide me, I could wait in peace. In the secret place, God will hide me from the fear, the anxiety and the pain of waiting, knowing that no matter what the technician saw on the scan God would be with my Mom all the way. I'm learning to trust Him more and more even when I don't know how things are going to end up.

Oh that He would hide me in the secret place...

As I walk this uncertain journey, let me admonish you to trust Him even when you don't know how things are going to end up. Exhale and let the pressure escape and learn to rest in Him. He is the only person that can solve your issue and concern. Learn to turn things over to Him and just go along for the ride. But while you are riding along with the cares of this world, don't forget to look out the window and enjoy the scenery. Take on the beauty of God and all that He has created and rest in that. God will allow you to enjoy some things even when you are on one of your harrowing journeys. So hide in His creation and His love for you. Hide in the fact that He is there with you.

It doesn't get any better than that.

Blessings,

Melodie

The Doctor's Visit

On a recent doctor's visit, my mom's platelet count was found to be extremely high. Of course, when Britt was sick, I monitored her counts on a daily basis. I knew a high (or low) count was nothing to fool around with. I immediately became concerned. My Mom has always been the calm, stoic one who never allowed anything ruffle her feathers. So when her doctor suggested a colonoscopy, she didn't flinch.

I sat there in shock but quicky got myself together. After several more doctors and visits to their offices, the day of the colonoscopy had arrived. I was assured by the nurses that she would be back from the procedure in 30-45 minutes. Reading old magazines, listening to CNN didn't calm my nerves. It wasn't that I hadn't sat in a treatment waiting room a thousand times before, nor was I not use to procedures taking longer that stated. But as I sat there those 45 minutes became three hours. My poor mommy!

Finally I was ushered back to an exhausted doctor, who had laid out a collection of pictures for me to see. His concern was just with one. There staring back at us was an ugly polyp, who refused to come out completely. "I couldn't get it all. You see where I stained it? That is where we are going to have to go back. She's been back there for almost three hours. " He suggested another colonoscopy in four to six weeks. I met my mother back in the pre-treatment room and there she sat, with not a worry or concern. We packed up and traveled home after a quick stop at Starbucks. Of course, the enemy began to speak to me and I immediately began to pray and confess the Word of God over my mother's health. As I drove, I glanced over as my mother nodded off and on. I prayed as she slept that God would give me the strength to support her and keep her encouraged.

We waited for a few days and around 5:30, we got the dreaded phone call. My mom's doctor, trying to sound as supportive as he could, let us know that the polyp that he removed was cancerous. My heart dropped to the floor and it seemed like by breath had stopped. I glanced over at my mom as she sat in the family room folding laundry. How was I going to tell her? Knowing how she worried, I knew that this news would keep her up at night. Lord Jesus, how do I tell her? When do I tell her? I ran up to the guest room and prayed. Then I sat there and remembered Britt's struggle, her battles with chemo and her willingness to fight. She got it from somewhere and I knew that her strength came from my mother. Some admire me because of my own strength, but like Britt, I stand as resilently as I can because of what my mother gave to me. So I must assume, she would be strong enough to handle whatever news I gave her. But I didn't want her to to worry that day or the immediate days to come so I didn't tell her. I called my cousin (a doctor in NY) and I shared all the details. She counseled me and agreed with me that a few day wouldn't matter.

Instead, I prayed more and trusted God. And I loved my mother with things she loved to do, like getting her hair done and going to Shomars and buying her favorite fish sandwich. As I allowed the days to pass, I would watch my mother and would just become full. Brittany and now my mother...God help me! But instead of crying and getting depressed, I committed my mornings to a more intimate time in prayer for my mother, my family, our ministry and God's plan for our life. I had to lay all of those issues at the feet of Jesus. There I would lay my burden down of worry and concern and trust God to take care of everything. With that realization and acceptance, I decided to let God handle it. For he promised that He would never leave me nor forsake me. And as the days passed by, I knew that He would handle everything. With that acknowledgement, I exhaled.

Pushing, Pressing and Praying Through - A Choice We Have To Make

Every challenge that confronts me has the opportunity to impact my life in a positive or negative way. In times past, I would allow the pressure to overwhelm me, consume me, distract me. But with growth and God's grace, I now realize that I have a choice to make. Every person who reads this blog can make the same choice. We must all ask ourselves, how am I going to allow this event to influence my life? The question is pretty simple; yet we in our complex lives, complicates matters with complex solutions. Not me, well, not anymore. I've learned that the pressures of living, the accidental circumstances, the happenstances, the coincidences can take me over the edge if I allow it. But not me.

I look back and I realize that when I lost my daughter I had a choice.. The grief was so powerful, so consuming that I allowed it to drop me into an abyss that I recently climbed out of...it was a scary journey. Although I invited God in, I wouldn't consider allowing him to bring me out. He in His infinite grace and mercy, allowed me to stay there; but He quietly stayed by my side, insuring me of my safety and sanity. Yet, I had a choice to make. I made a quality decision and that decision was life changing. I made a choice to live. I pushed myself to get up each morning and mother my sons. I could have stayed in the bed and cried and lamented, but instead I did things a mother is supposed to do; love my sons, feed my sons, help with their laundry, encourage them over homework and just be there to let them know how important they were to me. I could have easily ignored them, instead I pressed through the hurt and loved them. I could have allowed my grief to overshadow the fact, that I still had two sons to love and raise. But instead, I chose to do what was best for them.

Even with that lesson learned, I continue to face many challenges. The pressure of ministry often made me yearn to go on sabbatical and stay away for an extended period of time. But God told me, you can't run from the pressures of responsibility no matter how difficult it becomes. You must face each challenge, knowing that God has your back. The blessed thing is if you love God, (and you know that He loves you) God is going to bring you through each challenge anyway. And still I struggle with the fact that God is not just a God over problems but He wants to direct you each day which each step that you make. The question is, will you allow Him to do that in your life? And if you say, yes, remember that you can't allow confusion to cloud your judgement. He wants to instruct you in the way that you should go. Still, we all have a choice to make. Will we let him in?

So what choice do I make? I'm going to trust Him to carry me. But while I am trusting him, I'm going to push through the circumstances of life. I'm going to push through the maze that clouds my direction. I'm going to push through the pressure of having to perform; I'm going to push past the questions that confront me. Questions, like, what about the book? What about the company? What about the plan and what about the dream? All these question, only God has the answers. So why shouldn't I push through until he tells me what He wants me to do.

What is the other choice that I must make? I've got to press through the confusion, the worry and the doubt and trust God to give me clear insight and direction. Pressing through pain and discouragement, can distract you...if you allow it. Sometimes the pain is so great; even as you press through, it tries to take your breath away. Often times, pressing through means allowing yourself to exhale. And I mean that literally. Just taking a deep breathe and breathing out, allows the body to destress and relax. But we must decide to PRESS!!!! Press through all the things that wants to take you in the wrong direction.

Most importantly, we must pray through every situation that we confront. God impressed upon my heart to take my intercession to another level. Isn't it funny, how often we stop praying when we are confronting the most pain? Well, God told me, the things that I want from Him will never come if I don't go to the next level in prayer. Well, I've never prayed so intensely as I have prayed these past months. The blessing is, I have seen a tremendous blessing in my walk with Him. The vision that God has given me is clearer and I have detailed instructions on what to do to make them come to pass. But this would have never happened, if I would not have taken my prayer life to another level. And praying is WORK! Yes, it is sweet communion with God and it is a great time of fellowship with him, but readers, if you want to tear down some serious strongholds, it is warfare. And warfare is WORK through prayer.

Had I chosen not to participate and not pray...well things would be a lot worse. Had I chosen not to press through the issues of life, I bet you I would have had a nervous breakdown by now. And had I not chosen to push through my grief I would probably have died six months ago.

But God gives us choices. And I am so grateful that He was there to help me make the right one. I decided, instead of succumbing to the pressure, I'm pushing through it with faith. I pressing on with power and I'm staying on my knees in prayer asking God to be a part of it all.

Who am I kidding? I couldn't have handled it on my own anyway.
Blessings,
Melodie

A Rite of Passage

He did it. I can't believe it but he finally did it. My son, on the first try, passed the exam for his driver's permit. He didn't miss any on the sign test and just a few on the exam. I'm proud but now he's going to expect to drive everyday. I hate to tell him that driving is a priviledge that is earned. It is not an entitlement. Although, we could use another driver as busy as our schedules are.

But do you know what is amazing? He studied for the driver's exam and I mean studied. He really wants to drive. Isn't it amazing how much our kids put into a task, when it benefits them?

I just wish he would embrace homework that way. At fifteen, he can't see the value or the benefit of homework or studying hard. Being a smart kid, he feels that if he does enough to get by, that should be sufficient. Well, I think I already wrote about Mommy's School. Well, school commences this Thursday. We are spending the afternoon in the library preparing for the PSAT. He doesn't feel like it is needed. "Isn't it a test that sees how much I know?" "It doesn't matter about that test. I don't need it." All lame excuses for not wanting to take studying seriously. (I've got a lot of work to do!)

With the death of their sister, I have been lenient to the point that I have not challenged their intellect. I don't know... both boys are very intelligent. They have done well. But I didn't push the homework like I should. Both boys are honor roll students so I didn't feel like they needed the challenge. I felt that they needed time to adjust, recover and deal with the loss. (Let's be honest, I needed to deal with the loss and grieve myself. ) So I didn't push it. Well, it has been nearly 21 months since Britt's death and my boys are getting older. If I don't start training them now, it is going to be very difficult to do it in the future. (And no, it is not too late for my fifteen year old. Difficult, maybe. Too late, never.)

My fifteen old now looks at me like I am crazy because now I am starting to push those buttons. I expect him to deliver. It is very challenging but I know the value of taking school seriously. He will go far if he does well. It is my responsiblity to make sure that he does everything he needs to do, to be prepared and focused. So I'm ready for the challenge. And he will be too.

But would someone PLEASE pray for me?! Homework now includes driving practice.

A Bona Fide Member of the Sandwich Generation

The sandwich generation has been defined as those adults who are raising kids and taking care of their elderly parents all at the same time. Well, that is definitely me. These last few weeks have been tough. I've been busy working on our condensed Women's Season at our church. My husband celebrated his 51st birthday on the 4th. Some members of the church threw him a beautiful celebration with a sit down dinner and we were impressed. It was a wonderful church event. The family party is this weekend. My husband's siblings will be in town. It will be a great weekend, filled with great food (I can't wait!), fellowship and family fun.
My boys are back in school. I'm relieved but worried, because this is the season that I must really begin my serious training sessions for my 15 year old. (I'm way behind in this department). He's brilliant, but lazy and hates to read. Well, he's going to start "Mommy's School" since he never seems to have home work. I know that it will be a major transition for him. Both boys treat our home like a five star resort. They each have their favorite space and life is just wonderful. My fifteen year old is on the computer, wishing for his dream car. I've seen every model imaginable and I just have to sigh and smile. I don't know where he got the idea that we were going to buy him a $30,000-$40,000 luxury sports car. I know, I know. The Driver's Ed class was passed and now he's just waiting for Mommy to take him to the DMV. Then we have to get the car. I want to tell him so bad, "until we find you a nice used model, you'll be driving Mommy's minivan". He'll be heartbroken but he's got to learn that if he wants nice things he going to have to work for them. And working to me, is doing things around the house without being asked. Now that is going to be the struggle. We've decided to get him a small "hooptee". This is synonymous to a seven to ten year old car with about 45,000 miles on it. Like I said, he will be heartbroken but he will get over it. He's bargaining and bartering. "I'll work and get the down payment", he suggests. I just laugh. It's hard for him to vacuum without him justifying why he doesn't want to do it right now. "If you get me my car, then I will..." Well the list goes on and on. He'll do a lot of things for the car. And he wants to get a job where you actually have to work. (Does he think, I think he is going to actually do that ?) I just want him to do things because I have asked him to. You know, obedience and submission. Hence, Mommy school. It won't be fun, but I guarantee he'll be better for it.

Then there is Bryson, my 10 year old. Smart as a whip but is passionate about CARTOONS and the Disney Channel. This boy has clocked more hours in front of the TV than I have reading my Bible. Since he is so smart, he does his homework in about twenty minutes. And his favorite reply is, "Mom, I read at school". And off to my bedroom where he has the full use of our master bedroom suite. He calls it his personal lounge. Well, I fooled him. With school in the second week, he went to the condensed version of Mommy School. I signed him up for the school's Afterschool Enrichment Program. I was never so glad as I was when I gave them my $150 registration fee and gladly paid for the month of September at $200 a pop!!! We'll he's running, jumping, sweating, doing his homework, reading and he gets home just in time for dinner. Then he has a short TV time and then he is off for a shower and bed time. (Well, I couldn't take it away completely. An hour or so of TV is a lot better than four hours of watching TV.) During the summer I started him reading "Black Boy" by Richard Wright. Since I read this in undergrad, I'm wasn't pressing him to read a 384 page novel during his summer vacation. Like I said, he's only ten. But he seems to be enjoying it and he is still waddling through Part I: Southern Night, as we journey into September. So when he has nothing to do or proclaims that he is bored, I direct him to the novel and he quickly finds something to do after about 30 minutes of reading. Mommy School...it is a wonderful thing.

Then there are my parents. I love them so much but they are my children as well. (At least, that is how I feel sometimes.) My father loves the fact that I have to wait on him hand and foot. My husband calls me "the new wife" since my Mom has relegated all of his demands to me. Of course, I just smile a lot and say "yes, Daddy". But I want to scream when he doesn't want to finish his meal or gets chewing gum on my new sofa. And when he gets it all over his pajamas (that now need to be thrown away) I just want to cry. Especially when he looks me dead in my eyes and swears that he didn't do it. He blames my mother. She is the one that got chewing gum on his pajamas. I worry about him getting enough nutrients. He doesn't have a good appetite anymore and we are buying Ensure by the case. But his days are filled with reading the newspaper and he is content watching the Price is Right and Wheel of Fortune. For a 91 year old, life has never been so good. My mom is precious. At 86, she wants to do things around the house and I have to put my foot down and say no (very respectfully, of course.) I was in a worried state because I was afraid that she had cancer. We have been going back and forth to the doctor for the past three weeks and praise be to God - no cancer. But like one doctor said, "you don't have a problem, Ms. Key, but you do have an issue." For now we will watch her and get her blood checked every two weeks. We're trying to get her to gain some weight. We have another doctor's visit tomorrow to check more into that. Malabsorption, they say. Maybe she is allergic to gluten. We don't know, but I worry and I pray.

As a minister I know that we are to "trust in the Lord with all our heart and lean not to our own understanding". But when it is your parents and it is your responsibility to take care of them, sometimes you can't help it. So each day, I make sure they are fed, clean, have had their meds and are enjoying a lot of sunshine and of course the CBS soaps and the game shows. My boys are wonderful and will graduate from Mommy School. And yes, they will grow up to be awesome men of God who have successful lives and bright futures. And yes, our marriage is wonderful and we enjoy working together and sharing in this thing called ministry.

Life is somewhat harried, but I'm learning how to deal with it with less pressure and better insight. I'm prioritizing and honing my organizational skills. I've learned what my limits are and now am not afraid to say "No" when I need to.

Yes, I am a bona fide member of the sandwich generation and learning from each bite of it.

Will We Stand Up and Vote?

Since the 2008 Presidential Primary, I have been amazed at the atmosphere in the political arena. Pundits are so vindictive that candidates (and even viewers) could threaten a lawsuit. They are so busy calling names, sharing their perception of candidates' weaknesses, insinuating their lack of leadership that we lose focus on the important issues. I just want a truthful presentation of a honest candidate whose heart is filled with compassion for our country and the people who live in it.

No one likes to wear their politics on their sleeves. Well, there are some, but I have heard that it is so unethical to do so. When it comes to religion and politics, we are taught to keep our views on the "DL", (down low) because we don't want to offend. If we talk about Jesus, someone might get offended. If we share our views on political candidates someone might get offended and not like us anymore. Many are questioning this country's ability to be lead by an African American man. Even on MSNBC this week, a pundit was bold enough to declare, "this is a race issue". Sadly, I must agree.

I don't know. With everything our country has been through with Watergate, the hostage crisis, the Iran-Contra Affair, Whitewater, the Monica Lewinsky scandal, 9/11, and all the other "gates" I can't recall, I'm ready for something and someone different. I'm ready for leadership that is solid and focus. I'm ready to be lead by a man who is sincere when he shows his wife affection and doesn't care who writes about it. I'm ready to lead by a man who has a solid foundation in Christ (and no, it doesn't matter to me who is Pastor use to be). And yes, I'm even ready to lead by a man who doesn't have all the answers but he won't be ashamed to ask for help.

There are so many issues that we face as a country. Is there anyone out there who is willing to take a stand and a risk? Are you watching the news? Do you see what is going on in our country? And could someone please tell me when our troops are coming home?

I don't know, with gas at an all time high and grocery store receipts getting more outrageous, I want to shout and tell everyone to stand up! With families losing their homes by the hundred of thousands and folks losing their jobs, somebody better get concerned. With New Orleans still in a state of devastation, it seems like they all have been forgotten. Someone needs to pray and lead. With political leaders more concerned about their image and how they are perceived, no wonder we are in the state that we are in. Would someone please get concerned about the family who can't meet their bills? Would someone please get involved with the lady whose husband is abusing her? Would someone please get concerned about the family who is going to lose their home in the next 45 days? Would someone cook dinner for the solider who just returned home because he lost his leg in Iraq and his family is in a state of shock?

With all these issues our country is facing, would someone please stand up and VOTE this November? Take the biggest risk in your life and vote. We need CHANGE like we never needed it before.

The Power of Lasting Friendship

Do you know the importance of a lasting friendship? And when I type "lasting", I'm not talking about a friend that you met four years ago at the local church, PTA or neighborhood watch meeting. Those friends are wonderful to have. Don't get me wrong. It is a blessing when the Lord gives you a friend especially when you haven't had a good one in a long time. Someone to share with, laugh with and hang out with at the local mall. But this type of friendship is different. I'm talking about a friend that you have had over 10, 15 or 25 years. The type of friend that walks with you through heartache, divorce or great loss. This type of friend knows all your idiosyncrasies and loves you anyway. A friend who knows your greatest fears yet strives to push you to your greatest level. I'm blessed. I have some wonderful friends that I've know for over twenty -five years. But I'm not even talking about them. (If you are reading this blog entry...I love you, I really do!)

No, I'm talking about these friends. These three women (they're sisters) are my oldest friends. Meet Caroline, (me), Kelly and Chris. I met Kelly when I was three or four years old. I could have been younger. One of my youngest memories is of me crying because Kellie had to report to school on the first day. I couldn't tag along. I wasn't old enough to go to school. I think I was four. I was heartbroken. I remember it like it was yesterday. All I know is I have known her my entire life. Kelly has been my best friend for over forty years. When baby sister Caroline, could walk independently, she tagged along on all of our adventures whether we wanted her to or not. She was a constant reminder that she was a part of us too. And we didn't really appreciate Chris until we got a little bit older. She liked to boss us around but she could play a mean hands of jacks.

We were a part of the "Hartley Hill Gang". The title, we gave to ourselves. It's the street we lived on some 40 years ago. And surprisingly, there were more of us. Richie, Toni, Zep, Terry, Mary Gail, Linda, Lou Ellen and Wilma all were a part of those childhood memories. During elementary and middle school we had pageants, fashion shows, singing contests and boy, could we play church. We hiked hours in the woods and scoured the neighborhood for apple trees. We ate them green and raw.

Remembering those summer nights of "One, Two, Three Red Light", "Red Rover", "Hide and Seek" only brought back fonder memories of summer days of softball, kickball and tag. Choir rehearsal, Vacation Bible School (VBS) and days up at the Rec filled our summer days with Jesus, Bible verses and days on the swings . I'll never forget when there was going to be an eclipse. We all believed that it was the end of the world. Did we panic? No! We gathered on the softball field, joined hands and prayed for God's divine intervention!!!!

During high school, we went to Chris' basketball games, I marched in the band and Kellie cheered at the football games. We went on triple dates, hung out at Broyhill Park and spent summer days at Lake James. (Caroline wasn't old enough and we FINALLY got to leave her at home.) But those days we were home, we spent hours reading Harlequin Romances, Silhouette Desires and listened to R&B. We danced, joked and laughed until our sides would ache and tears streamed down our faces. We did everything together. We got our ears pierced...together. We went to the pool...together. We shared cookies and peach sodas from their Grandfather's store...together. One day, we decided to play with matches and we inadvertently set the woods on fire. The fire trucks came and of course, they blamed me. Didn't we do everything TOGETHER?! No, we did not get a spanking together...only me. (I'm still upset about it!)

Yet, here we are together again. Last weekend, some 40 plus years later, we celebrated Chris and her husband, LeChone's 18 year Recommitment Ceremony. (Isn't she beautiful?) We laughed and cried. Chris cried through the entire ceremony. When she wasn't crying, she was laughing. It was the funniest thing. Kelly, Caroline and I tried to be adult and not fall on the floor from laughing. (By the way, we use to be terrible in church. We would laugh at the Mothers of the church who sang off key and we tried our best not to pee on ourselves...literally. But remember, we were only 9, 12, and 13.) Yet, here we were in Havelock, NC all grown up, acting like three young school girls, laughing at the most inappropriate time and I was remembering yesterday.

Yes, these are my oldest and dearest friends. We finish each other's sentences. We know what the other is thinking and can quickly state it better than the other. We have loved and supported each other through the death of their young mother, their father and my daughter. We endured parental alcoholism, a family shooting and high school heartbreak (three of us...well, Kelly would say two of us). Oh, the ties that bind. We have been in each other's weddings and supported two through divorce, one during the death of a fiance and loved one through some difficult personal trials. They love my parents as if they were their own and we share the love for our children. Still, on last weekend, (although it was Chris's day), it was still about us. The Hartley Hill Gang, sharing yet another milestone in the life of one another. As we stood taking this picture, I couldn't help but reminisce about the days in the apple trees and playing kickball on the Hill. It is amazing how God can bless you with this much love through the power of friendship. He intricately entwined our lives together that even when we are a part, we are still together.

As we loaded up the car to leave the hotel, I hugged Kelly and Caroline with tears threatening to stream down my face. These were my friends, (I would even say, my sisters), who will always be a part of me. I look back over my own life and I realize that I would not be the woman I am today had these women not been in my life. I don't think I could have made it this far without them.

So to you, I say, treasure that old friend. Call them up, reminisce and talk about "the old days". Share those powerful stories and great adventures that made you laugh and cry.

But try not to pee in your pants.

Blessings,

Melodie

Just A Girl's Getaway

You never know how the Lord is going to orchestrate your life from one week to another. Last week, I nervously awaited a Doctor's consult on my Mom's recent weight loss. It is terrible waiting, praying, begging, proclaiming that all things are well. We are still waiting but instead of being nervous or anxious, God allowed my Mom and me to go on a two-day getaway. This was a very special trip. We were going to a Recommitment Service of one of my oldest friends. She and her husband were celebrating eighteen years of marriage and my Mom and I wouldn't have miss it. So the trip was very important. But my Mom is 86 years old. She is not as spry as she used to be. And many times she gets confused. She has to use the assistance of a walker and sometimes she even calls me Brittany. Even when she is confused or she can't remember a certain fact, I get concerned. She is my Mommy and as times passes, I often think about the future and the possibility of life without her. I am determined that age it isn't going to hinder her. While she is young at heart, I want her to enjoy life. I call her my baby and she is. I ask her, "Moma, do you think I treat you like a baby?" She just smiles and says, "No, you just love me." So, I had the luggage, my tote, her tote, my computer, snacks, her purse, napkins, her jacket, her coffee and the BoJangles sausage biscuits. We were ready and the walker was on the back seat.
On this trip, like so many others, we had the best time talking about marriage, our husbands, the children, church and her favorite, the local foliage. Mom is a plant and tree freak (I say that respectfully, of course!) and it is nothing for her to talk a hour about wild flowers and native trees that line the highway. But when we are in the car for hours, (this trip was six!), traveling can be hard. But I am so grateful! There I was, with my Mom, reminiscing about my childhood days, the antics of me and my childhood friends and the importance of family. She was giving me wise counsel on raising my own children, the importance of being a good wife, and the importance of good music in the church. Somewhere between Raleigh and Clayton, I couldn't help but get misty. She was talking and talking, and in my heart, I was so full. I was blessed to have her impart into my life. She wasn't going to let age stop her from being my Mom. No, she shared and I listened. "Yes, Mam," "Uh-huh" and "Okay" were my replies and for a split second I thought about her not being around forever. What would life be like without her as a sounding board in my life? Moments like these are so precious.

As we traveled this weekend, God gave me a special gift; a forty-eight hour girl's getaway. Times past, I thought a two-day girl's getaway would be hanging out at the local spa, with massage, spa lunch and shopping. But God let me see how wonderful it is to be able to travel with your mother, even when she is 86 years old and on a walker. I will treasure every memory and each conversation. The look of excitement that crossed her face, as we entered a small town where she had never been. The joy of seeing my old friends and Mom being able to recall things that happened to us thirty-five years ago. Most importantly, to be able to share with my Mom the joy and tears of a old friend who is so much in love she cried throughout her own recommitment ceremony - even after eighteen years of marriage. It was a beautiful weekend and I didn't think of that Doctor's appointment once.
Blessings,
Melodie

You would never guess how long it has taken me to design this blog! After having such a predestined time at SheSpeaks, (more on the conference later) I was determined to come home and start a blog. The conference was awesome. When you leave, you feel like you can do anything!!! Well, that is not the case. I left SheSpeaks knowing I would have my blog up in a matter of days and that was back in June. It’s pitiful, I know, but every free moment I been toiling down in my office, designing, adding gadgets, trying to import pictures that don't look like postage stamps (I still haven’t figured that out!). I think it has a lot to do with my intimidation of technology. I go in believing that is going to be hard and guess what, it is. That is the reason my brand new digital camera and my brand new Palm is still sitting in the box begging to be used. Can you believe that I just purchased an I-Phone? It is a struggle but I’m able to answer the phone. (Although it did take me two weeks to figure out how to program my voicemail).

So now I am venturing in the blogosphere determine that I will post something of substance. I pray that it is a blessing and your lives will be enriched. Talk about a faith walk and needing “Big Shoes”. But I am determined to try new things even though I am intimidated and I can’t find even find my “Big Shoes”. I think faith is about taking great risk and trusting God while you do it. Sometimes you have to trust God when you don't know the difference between a html and a dashboard. Yikes!

But God is faithful? When I look back over my life it is amazing how much He has blessed me. I have been married to the same wonderful and loving man for nearly 25 years. What a blessed journey. We partner in ministry and find great joy in serving God full-time. It is a blessing that God chose us!! We have three incredible children...but only two are living. We lost our beloved Britt to cancer 19 months ago and our lives will never be the same! Each day is a challenge, but still we trust Him! God has blessed us with two marvelous sons, Brian and Bryson. We strive to serve the Lord and make a difference in the lives of His people, one day at a time. As we face the challenges of ministry we trust God to anoint us to lead the lost and the hopeless back to Him. What a wonderful assignment for His Kingdom and we are striving to meet each challenge in "Big Shoes". With a hug from my kids and a cup of coffee with my husband, each day gets better and better. It is a priviledge to serve God and his people. Now, how do I post this thing?
Sweet Blessings,
Melodie