This Friday I will be 48 years old. It is amazing to me because when I was a kid, 48 was old. Now this number represents a window of opportunity, a gate to taking more risks and a door open to dreams being claimed and fulfilled. It's strange when I should have been focused on accomplishing "things" I was focused on my children, their dreams and ministry. Nothing is wrong with any of those things, but somewhere along the way, I forgot about me. Forgetting about oneself is a common factor in the lives of women who are busy raising families, loving their spouses and helping the community. One day we simply wake up to a ticking clock reminding us that time is running out.
That clock has been going off for so long that many of us, have gotten use to hitting the snooze bar. We have snoozed so long, we now wake up panting and fretting that time is running out. I felt like that, guilty that I hadn't accomplished all that I wanted to do. Guilty, that I still haven't finished grad school and fifty is right about the corner. Guilty, that the book isn 't finished as I struggle everyday to block some time just to write. Guilty, because the CD isn't recorded and the contract isn't signed.
But God is loving, kind in His infinite wisdom and so patient with his weary children. When He said in the book of Ecclesiastes, to everything there is a season, I frequently excluded my dreams from that group. It was for everyone but me. But he gently reminded me that when I come into my season, there is nothing that I can't do. I only have myself to blame because I let my shortcomings and my lack of focus deter the dream that I had hidden in my heart. And yet God knew this and was patient with me as I got myself together.
Many times I lost focus because I was concerned about people's perception and acceptance. But I had to realize and accept that this was between me and God. And no one else.
God was going to do a great work in my life, but I had to change my perspective and prepare for the inevitable. God had a plan for my life and it was my responsiblity to engage in it. It was that simple.
So as I turn 48 at the end of the week, I have a new determination. To some it may be just another year but to me it is something entirely different. A doorway of possibilities is waiting for me to walk through it. A gate in a new field of dreams beacons for me to take bigger chances and greater risk. And finally there is a window longing for me to climb through it to a room with a view of favor, grace and purpose. It is going to be WONDERFUL.
Come on 48...
Tuesday, February 2, 2010
Monday, February 1, 2010
Getting My House In Order
Every January my husband declares the word for the year to our church. From Thanksgiving to the first Sunday of January, the congregation eagerly awaits the word that will sustain and empower us all year long. This year was no different. And as Tony stood flat-footed and declared that this was The Year of Divine Order, I was amazed as he inspired and instructed us to get our houses in order. He systematically itemized a list that made us question our motives, access our ambition and confront our laziness. I was convicted. When I thought of my to-do list, my list of aspirations and my wish list it seemed that I somehow allowed those things to be covered with the cobwebs of busyness and idleness. What a contradiction! I had a lot of work to do. My goals were attainable, but I readily allowed my schedule to be clouded with more stuff to do. I could be more productive but daily I walked a maze of indecisiveness and loss of focus. When I could be outlining a chapter or organizing my office, I easily would choose to watch a favorite program or take a very long nap. (Not that naps are bad...they can take up a lot of productive time.)
I have to admit that I tend to do too many things at once and my expectation of excellence is often short lived. When I look at the important things like taking care of my mother, my children, my home I often am disappointed because my wish list isn't being fulfilled. We won't even mention my perosnal time with God. But doing those things are very important. I have to do them with the acknowledgement that they must come first AND I can still be productive with just a little more organization. Isn't it funny, when you know what to do but you choose not to do it?
But this is the seaon of order, Divine Order, and we, as believers, must choose to pursue it. Even if it means reassessing our lifestyles, our habits and our secret idiosyncrasies. Order must be pursued if success is going to be obtained. For many it might be intimidating. But the good news is, it is still January. I have enough time to make this year more productive. I can reassess my goals and plan accordingly so I can accomplish those things that will make me feel productive and successful. One thing that I have to admit is that I am very busy. Mother, wife, daughter, minister, manager, writer, coordinator, teacher, preacher and administrator are the main things that I do. I have mastered the art of juggling a thousand balls at once but that isn't order. That is having too many options that don't meet my standard of excellence.
In getting my house in order I must strategize my day where I am more effective, more productive and I am taking better care of myself. Less stress, more discipline and more rest. Rest may mean a bubble bath instead of a short shower. Rest may mean a short nap when I feel frazzled or tense. Rest may mean a long ride with my husband just to exhale and destress. Then there is organization. I need to master the art of list making. I do this in my head daily, but I carry a planner that at year's end is full of clean pages. To me, it's really simple. Taking the time to make a daily list is one way to keep me structured and organzied. Planning is worthless when your task list is inconsistent and unclear. The next mandate is follow through. When I make the list, it is imperative that I follow through finishing at much as I can. Delegation must be expanded to more areas in my life. It will relieve me from the pressure of doing so much and I can then focus on my wish list. (My wish list is writing my book and getting it accepted by a publisher by the end of 2020!)
It seems like a lot but that what order is about. Order can be defined as "a standard or prescribed arrangements of component parts". In other words I need a "1, 2, 3 method" of doing things. A systematic viewpoint that will guide me through my daily decisions and responsibilities. The wonderful thing about it all is, IT CAN BE DONE! With focus, prayer and perserverance, it can be done. And I am just the woman to do it!!!
I have to admit that I tend to do too many things at once and my expectation of excellence is often short lived. When I look at the important things like taking care of my mother, my children, my home I often am disappointed because my wish list isn't being fulfilled. We won't even mention my perosnal time with God. But doing those things are very important. I have to do them with the acknowledgement that they must come first AND I can still be productive with just a little more organization. Isn't it funny, when you know what to do but you choose not to do it?
But this is the seaon of order, Divine Order, and we, as believers, must choose to pursue it. Even if it means reassessing our lifestyles, our habits and our secret idiosyncrasies. Order must be pursued if success is going to be obtained. For many it might be intimidating. But the good news is, it is still January. I have enough time to make this year more productive. I can reassess my goals and plan accordingly so I can accomplish those things that will make me feel productive and successful. One thing that I have to admit is that I am very busy. Mother, wife, daughter, minister, manager, writer, coordinator, teacher, preacher and administrator are the main things that I do. I have mastered the art of juggling a thousand balls at once but that isn't order. That is having too many options that don't meet my standard of excellence.
In getting my house in order I must strategize my day where I am more effective, more productive and I am taking better care of myself. Less stress, more discipline and more rest. Rest may mean a bubble bath instead of a short shower. Rest may mean a short nap when I feel frazzled or tense. Rest may mean a long ride with my husband just to exhale and destress. Then there is organization. I need to master the art of list making. I do this in my head daily, but I carry a planner that at year's end is full of clean pages. To me, it's really simple. Taking the time to make a daily list is one way to keep me structured and organzied. Planning is worthless when your task list is inconsistent and unclear. The next mandate is follow through. When I make the list, it is imperative that I follow through finishing at much as I can. Delegation must be expanded to more areas in my life. It will relieve me from the pressure of doing so much and I can then focus on my wish list. (My wish list is writing my book and getting it accepted by a publisher by the end of 2020!)
It seems like a lot but that what order is about. Order can be defined as "a standard or prescribed arrangements of component parts". In other words I need a "1, 2, 3 method" of doing things. A systematic viewpoint that will guide me through my daily decisions and responsibilities. The wonderful thing about it all is, IT CAN BE DONE! With focus, prayer and perserverance, it can be done. And I am just the woman to do it!!!
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