A New Determination and Just Another Year

This Friday I will be 48 years old. It is amazing to me because when I was a kid, 48 was old. Now this number represents a window of opportunity, a gate to taking more risks and a door open to dreams being claimed and fulfilled. It's strange when I should have been focused on accomplishing "things" I was focused on my children, their dreams and ministry. Nothing is wrong with any of those things, but somewhere along the way, I forgot about me. Forgetting about oneself is a common factor in the lives of women who are busy raising families, loving their spouses and helping the community. One day we simply wake up to a ticking clock reminding us that time is running out.

That clock has been going off for so long that many of us, have gotten use to hitting the snooze bar. We have snoozed so long, we now wake up panting and fretting that time is running out. I felt like that, guilty that I hadn't accomplished all that I wanted to do. Guilty, that I still haven't finished grad school and fifty is right about the corner. Guilty, that the book isn 't finished as I struggle everyday to block some time just to write. Guilty, because the CD isn't recorded and the contract isn't signed.

But God is loving, kind in His infinite wisdom and so patient with his weary children. When He said in the book of Ecclesiastes, to everything there is a season, I frequently excluded my dreams from that group. It was for everyone but me. But he gently reminded me that when I come into my season, there is nothing that I can't do. I only have myself to blame because I let my shortcomings and my lack of focus deter the dream that I had hidden in my heart. And yet God knew this and was patient with me as I got myself together.

Many times I lost focus because I was concerned about people's perception and acceptance. But I had to realize and accept that this was between me and God. And no one else.

God was going to do a great work in my life, but I had to change my perspective and prepare for the inevitable. God had a plan for my life and it was my responsiblity to engage in it. It was that simple.

So as I turn 48 at the end of the week, I have a new determination. To some it may be just another year but to me it is something entirely different. A doorway of possibilities is waiting for me to walk through it. A gate in a new field of dreams beacons for me to take bigger chances and greater risk. And finally there is a window longing for me to climb through it to a room with a view of favor, grace and purpose. It is going to be WONDERFUL.

Come on 48...

Getting My House In Order

Every January my husband declares the word for the year to our church. From Thanksgiving to the first Sunday of January, the congregation eagerly awaits the word that will sustain and empower us all year long. This year was no different. And as Tony stood flat-footed and declared that this was The Year of Divine Order, I was amazed as he inspired and instructed us to get our houses in order. He systematically itemized a list that made us question our motives, access our ambition and confront our laziness. I was convicted. When I thought of my to-do list, my list of aspirations and my wish list it seemed that I somehow allowed those things to be covered with the cobwebs of busyness and idleness. What a contradiction! I had a lot of work to do. My goals were attainable, but I readily allowed my schedule to be clouded with more stuff to do. I could be more productive but daily I walked a maze of indecisiveness and loss of focus. When I could be outlining a chapter or organizing my office, I easily would choose to watch a favorite program or take a very long nap. (Not that naps are bad...they can take up a lot of productive time.)



I have to admit that I tend to do too many things at once and my expectation of excellence is often short lived. When I look at the important things like taking care of my mother, my children, my home I often am disappointed because my wish list isn't being fulfilled. We won't even mention my perosnal time with God. But doing those things are very important. I have to do them with the acknowledgement that they must come first AND I can still be productive with just a little more organization. Isn't it funny, when you know what to do but you choose not to do it?



But this is the seaon of order, Divine Order, and we, as believers, must choose to pursue it. Even if it means reassessing our lifestyles, our habits and our secret idiosyncrasies. Order must be pursued if success is going to be obtained. For many it might be intimidating. But the good news is, it is still January. I have enough time to make this year more productive. I can reassess my goals and plan accordingly so I can accomplish those things that will make me feel productive and successful. One thing that I have to admit is that I am very busy. Mother, wife, daughter, minister, manager, writer, coordinator, teacher, preacher and administrator are the main things that I do. I have mastered the art of juggling a thousand balls at once but that isn't order. That is having too many options that don't meet my standard of excellence.



In getting my house in order I must strategize my day where I am more effective, more productive and I am taking better care of myself. Less stress, more discipline and more rest. Rest may mean a bubble bath instead of a short shower. Rest may mean a short nap when I feel frazzled or tense. Rest may mean a long ride with my husband just to exhale and destress. Then there is organization. I need to master the art of list making. I do this in my head daily, but I carry a planner that at year's end is full of clean pages. To me, it's really simple. Taking the time to make a daily list is one way to keep me structured and organzied. Planning is worthless when your task list is inconsistent and unclear. The next mandate is follow through. When I make the list, it is imperative that I follow through finishing at much as I can. Delegation must be expanded to more areas in my life. It will relieve me from the pressure of doing so much and I can then focus on my wish list. (My wish list is writing my book and getting it accepted by a publisher by the end of 2020!)



It seems like a lot but that what order is about. Order can be defined as "a standard or prescribed arrangements of component parts". In other words I need a "1, 2, 3 method" of doing things. A systematic viewpoint that will guide me through my daily decisions and responsibilities. The wonderful thing about it all is, IT CAN BE DONE! With focus, prayer and perserverance, it can be done. And I am just the woman to do it!!!

Is It Worth Waiting For?

He giveth power to the faint: and to them that have no might he increaseth strength. Even the youths shall faint and be weary; and the young men shall utterly fall: But they that wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk and not faint. Isaiah 40:29-31

Have you ever felt faint? I'm not talking about that feeling where you are looking for that knight in shiny armor to catch you. I'm talking about that feeling of faintness where you can't move forward. You can't breathe because you're overcome by stress and worry. This is the type of faint feeling I'm speaking.

God gives us a solution and encourages us in the book of Isaiah. He promises to give us power when we feel this way. When there comes a point that we feel like we have no might, he promises to increase our strength. Sadly, he tries to do this and we often ignore it. We succumb to the pressure of stress and fretting. We allow ourselves to stay planted in a position that cripples us. We can't move forward nor can we see what is ahead...even when we have a clear picture of what is before us. Instead, we allow this feeling of spiritual lethargy to sap our strength. We ride around in spiritual wheelchairs waiting for someone to push us around. Our vision is often cloudy and our path is overcome by darkness.

As believers, we shouldn't be shocked when this happens. God tells us that even the youth shall faint (and aren't they the ones who are supposed to have all this energy?) And even young men shall fall. So we shouldn't be surprised. It happens to everyone.

But even when it happens, God implores us to WAIT. We are not to become weary. God wants us to WAIT. And yes, waiting is hard, particulary when you have already waited for a long time. But he still tells us to wait. Because in our waiting, God renews our strength. And that is easily said than done. Because as he renews our strength, we have to allow him to do whatever needs to be done in us to make us stronger. Many times, that includes going through rough patches of trials and tribulations, loss and grief, disappointment and despair. God uses whatever he needs to make us better.

And things do get better because now we have a different viewpoint because of the experience. That is what the prophet means when he writes "they shall mount up with wings as eagles". When we develop eagle wings, we now have been strengthened to see things from a different perspective. We see above the fray instead of in the midst of it. Therefore, we aren't "in" it. We have a totally different viewpoint. We can see other views instead of just our own. Isn't it wonderful when we can see someone else's point of view? It makes us more reasonable and we are able to see more clearly. As a result, we become empowered to make better decisions.

When we are "in" it, we tend to get worn out from the constant need to fix it, comment on it or even change it. We have to accept the fact that when we agree to do all of "that" we get exhausted spiritually. There may even be some who love getting in the fray; who mentally love the thrill of winning the argument. They get a turn-on by getting those points across. But spiritually, they become faint. They can't breathe nor can they find the energy to move forward. They become so encumbered by all of it, they often forget who they are and more importantly, they lose focus of their purpose. It is at that moment when they often need others to pick them up. We should all learn a valuable lesson from "them" and learn that there is power in waiting on God.

We should never need anyone to pick us up when God is waiting to do so. We need to learn to run to him and wait on the manifestation that he has already promised. He promises to give us power and strength when we have every right to feel weary and faint.

Walking out this life of faith can often overwhelm us. To most, life's trial can be very difficult. But God is so faithful. He promises, if we learn to wait on him, things won't be as bad as they could be. He will give us the ability to run and not get weary. Even as we walk out life, we don't have to accept faintness of heart. Instead, we need to expect strength to overtake us. We need to expect God to be there because he is never faint nor is he ever weary. When we realize who God really is, then we have to embrace the fact that with him, we can face anything.

Now that is worth waiting for.

Happy Birthday to the Love of My Life

Happy Birthday to my beloved Tony. I had to write and share with everyone how blessed I am to have you in my life. I watch you day after day and am amazed at how the Lord has blessed you. You're smart, anointed, gifted, an awesome lover, a wonderful father, generous, loving and the greatest thing...you still have me laughing after 25 years of marriage.

When I look at how far we have come, I want the world to know how grateful I am that you are in my life. Through all the ups and downs of life, you still complete me. You still excite me and there is no other place I would rather be than by your side. Sharing my life with you has been a joy and as we continue to face each day, I know that the Lord will continue to bless us.

You are such of a great preacher; a man of God who walks in integrity and honor. I see how you love the people of God and I know how blessed they are to be under your leadership. You are a testimony for the power of God and what God can do to your life when you are yielded. Keep on walking in faith, trusting and believing God for the miraculous. I know that my faith has gone to another level because of what you taught me and the great example you have set before me.

And let me give you a wifely shout out! Sweetie, you sure can you "hang a suit". I still get weak in the knees when I see you walk in a room. Even after 25 years, I still catch my breath, when I see you.

I admire you for your great strength and courage. You carried me when we lost our three children. You constantly spoke into my life when I wanted to give in to the spirit of grief. To Nicky and Alex, I wish you could have known your wonderful father and shared all the great things he helped our family to experience. You girls would have experienced a great life full of love, laughter, joy (and great purses!). I know that your sister Brittany is telling you all the stories of her life with her Dad. Their late night conversations, their secret shopping excursions and their shared stories on faith and endurance. They had a remarkable relationship. Today we will think of the three of you and how our lives will never be the same without you.

But we will still celebrate. Tony, you have blessed so many with your faith. May we all learn to walk like you with the spirit of favor and a zest for life. Our sons will become great men of God because you father them with a love and tenderness that can not be surpassed. They see the man that you are and I know they both want to be just like you.

Happy Birthday, my beloved boo! May this day find you walking in the grace and favor of God.

May God answer all of your prayers and may you continue to walk in the anointing that is on your life. I thank God for you and our life together. I love you...

Blessings,

Melodie

The Power of His Grace...and Management

God has this incredible way of assuring me that He is in charge. Just when I think that I lost the battle, He steps in and assures me that He has my back. I don't know what is so difficult about trusting Him. Time after time, I "choke" trying to do things on my own.

Just this morning, I was ready and willing to give up on a major project that just couldn't get past the starting point. I was ready to throw in the proverbial towel and say forget it. But God in his grace, whispered to me, "hold on...you may be ready to quit, but I'm not finished yet."

And just like that, he reminded me that when I try to do things in the power of my might, I fail every time.

So instead of quitting, I'm waiting. Waiting for more instructions, more impartation and more of his Diving grace.

With that, I'm bound to be more successful through Him compared to anything that I am capable of doing on my own.

Blessings,
Melodie

Trust in the Lord with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding. In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths.

Proverbs 3:5,6

The Courage To Keep Fighting

Recently my husband and I visited an old friend. She went to college with my husband. It seems like they have been friends forever. (Well, to me they have). She and her husband were our first friends after we got married 25 years ago). She is extremely smart; an engineer by profession. She is confident and is the type of woman who has herself together. She is always willing to mentor, encourage and undergird you in anything that you attempt. That is how smart she is!

So it seems extremely unfair to me that she was diagnosed with colon cancer this past February.

We only recently found out because she didn't want to tell us. She didn't want us to go through it again since losing Brittany.

They caught it early, but she is undergoing preventive chemotheraphy.

And there is where we found her; in her beautiful home, receiving treatment through the port in her chest. The chemo was running through a small computerized pump whose strap had been slung over her shoulder like a small leather clutch big enough for a small wallet and maybe a driver's license.

Did I forget to mention that while she was hooked up, she was running her department at a government agency? (I told you she is extremely smart...) Laptop computer and cell phone hooked up, there she sat, answering emails, taking calls and attending meetings. The woman is AMAZING and is one of the strongest women I know.

Graciously sitting in her beautiful family room, she was doing the business of the day and taking a few minutes to visit with two old friends.

Now that is what I call walking in big shoes...

Accepting where you are, but not allowing it to take you under or out! Continuing to do your job with the best attitude although you have every right to have a stinky one...and doing it extremely well. Facing the challenges of a difficut disease, but not allowing it to wear you down.

But what I loved best was in spite of chemotherapy and a hectic schedule on the job, she took a few moments to be with friends. Friends who seemed to need the assurance that she was okay more than she did.

And after wonderful conversation, we had to get ready to catch our plane to return home. And as any good hostess would, she walked us to the door and saw us off.

Her courage and her strength helped me to remember that it's not what you go through...it's how you handle it.

Just another day in the life of a woman who has the courage to face any problem with her head ALWAYS looking up.

We should do the same.
Blessings,
Melodie

Too Many Irons in the Fire

As I review my Daytimer, I must admit that I have taken on more than I can do well. But taking one step at a time, I'm determined to keep looking ahead, plowing (and praying) as I go through this mountain of stuff that MUST get done.
Here's my to-do list. Would you please say a prayer?

1. Pray, study scripture and prepare a sermon.
2. Pack and visit family.
3. Arrive home and preach on Sunday afternoon.
4. Work and work hard on book projects.
5. Pack and go to airport.
6. Visit with Friends
7. Work even harder on book projects.
8. Prepare presentation and deliver it.
9. Pack and get ready for vacation. Can't wait.
10. Return home and visit family again.

And this is all in the next ten days. Please pray for me!
Whew...I am exhausted just thinking about it.

Blessings,
Melodie

It Was All For His Glory

Yesterday was an emotional day for me. All through the day, my emotions swung back and forth, like a steady pendulum on a classic grandfather's clock. From one extreme to another, I was filled with tears of joy, tears of sorrow and sadness and thankfully back to tears of great joy and gratefulness. Three gut wrenching episodes that I don't think I can share with you. Well, at least not today. That would be like asking for trouble. If I cried anymore, I would be drowning in the proverbial "river of tears". But one story touched my heart so much, well, I would be a fool not to share the beauty of it.

Most of you know, we lost our beloved Britt at seventeen, almost three years ago. (I sit amazed that so much time has past...and the Lord has allowed me to keep my sanity. God is so good!) When I found out that she had secondary leukemia after struggling with neuroblastoma, I was devastated. But when you are in the battle against cancer, you can't give up. You continue to press on ahead, searching for every little victory.

As a result, we had to abandon her treatment at Memorial Sloan Kettering in NY and start the transplant process all over again at Duke University Hospital. Before we departed for Duke, our immediate family was tested to see if we were a match. Sadly, none of us were. God had other plans.

Our church family led many bone marrow drives throughout the community with the National Marrow Donor Program (NMDP). Because of their love for Brittany and their love for us, they too, gave blood to see if they were a match. All were entered in the Bone Marrow Registry along with all the other volunteers who gave their blood, their time and their prayers.

I didn't think much of it when a church member said they were contacted by the Registry the latter part of last year. Most families who encounter cancer know, that even if you get "a hit" from the registry so many things can go wrong. So although you are hopeful and prayerful, you know that the excitement may not last long.

So I put it out of my mind and completely forgot about it. Until yesterday.

Yesterday, the spouse of that church member called and we were talking about the rest of our summer plans, family and the onset of a new school year. Then on the turn of a dime, she begin to share how her husband was preparing to go through the transplant process for a young man that they did not know. What?

As she shared all the medical procedures he had endured, I found myself filling in medical details that she didn't know and was amazed how it all came back to me. But the shock of it didn't hit me until she began to share a recent incident.

As she spoke, she told how her husband had gone through all preliminary testing. They had made several trips to the hospital where the young man was waiting for the necessary transplant. Nurses were coming to the house to take blood and to continue his necessary workup on several occasions. He had begun his series of Filgrastim (G-CSF), a medication that helps you build up your white blood cells) and was now preparing for the actual harvest of not only stems cells BUT bone marrow too. He was such of a great candidate that he had received another hit on the registry as well.

He is doing WHAT? Preparing to give bone marrow and stem cells?!

I was in a state of shock! They had been going through all this and I didn't have a clue. How could I have forgotten that he had been contacted by the NMDP registry?

Because he was such of an enigma, the nurse at the hospital sat down with them and asked him about his history. She wanted to know who was this young man who had two hits on the bone marrow registry and just how did he get on it? It was at that point that the couple began to share Brittany's story and the nurse asked, "well, how is she doing?" They shared of Britt's passing and said the inquisitive nurse just cried.

Well, although the dear wife of this man continued talking, it was then that I just lost it!!!

I sobbed in the phone and told her that I had to go. Softly, breaking through my muffled sobs, she quietly said, "we love you, Rev. Mel."

After I hug up the phone, the shock of what was just shared begin to answer some of the questions that every mother of a dead child has locked away in her spirit. "Why?"

We often ask God why when bad things happen to us. We often question His plan, His purpose for our lives. But I often thought about Britt's death being in vain. Why did she have to go through what she did? As a mother, no matter who shared a testimony about how she touched their lives, I still didn't find peace when it came to why God allowed her to die.

But as I listen to this story, I realize that the Lord was gently telling me that her life had more impact than I could ever imagine. Because of her illness, a young family will be blessed to have options.

Here is a young man, touched by Britt's sickness and her struggle, who selflessly gave of himself to help save another. ( The story sounds familiar....doesn't it?) Now we have a twenty year old man who will probably beat the enemy of cancer, because this man decided to sacrifice his time to be a blessing and to give the gift of life.

Well, I tell you, I just sobbed as the Holy Spirit ministered to me. For a moment the spirit of illumination came over me and allowed me to see just how precious my baby girl's life was as was her fight with cancer. It was all for a purpose. More importantly, it was all for His (Christ's)glory.

My tears flowed as I reconciled the fact that Britt went through all that she did because it had a purpose. Someone (that we don't even know) will have an abundant, prosperous life because a friend said yes to bone marrow donation. Britt's struggle opened up a door that would touch the heart of a man. He allowed himself to be tested and God, in His infinite wisdom, allowed him to be a near perfect match.

He is a near perfect match! How awesome is that?! What an awesome gift from God. Just imagine how the young patient's family must be feeling. On next week, this young man will get the blessing of a lifetime. I know that this family's heart is filled with unspeakable joy and gratitude.

And so is mine. So I can't clost this blog without making the appeal. Be a donor! Contact the National Marrow Donor Program TODAY and get tested. You could save a life and give a blessing of a lifetime.
For more information contact NMDP at www.marrow.org.

The Need to Reconnect

Yesterday I spoke with an old friend. Hearing her over the phone, brought me to such a place of remembrance. I reflected back to when we were in high school and how we were literally glued at the hip. My days were brightened by her contagious laugh, (and even yesterday I couldn't help but bend over with tears streaming down my face...she just cracks me up...) and things are no different now.

I missed her. Her friendship, her humor, her ability to make me feel better when an old boyfriend broke my heart or I was feeling bad about a poor test grade. When we were in high school, she was a bright spot in what I thought was a pretty mediocre existence.

As we talked yesterday, I realized that I would never allow this much time to pass again. We were both married now with kids. We talked about our adventures with our families. We promise to spend a day together in the very near future. "Just call me and I will be there", she said in the phone as we ended our conversation.

This is one date that I won't miss.

In times past, I would hear a comment like that and not see its value. The reunion date would come and go, buried under a pile of to do lists, "important" appointments and a day filled with "other things".

But I promise, I'm going to keep this appointment because old friends like her are NOT a dime a dozen. She is someone that I can sit down with and it will be just like "yesterday". Two girlfriends, laughing, joking and talking about our lives and seeing who is going to laugh the hardest. It's probably going to be me because she just cracks me up.

Friendship like this is what I call, "a safe place". A safe place to be yourself, share your secrets and even cry if you have to. And because she is the woman that I know she is, it wouldn't shock me if she began to cry with me.

Old friends like her are hard to come by. If you have one, treasure her (or him).
I didn't realize how important it was for me to reconnect with someone (that I haven't seen in years) that I truly missed until I heard her laughter on yesterday.

It is true...laughter does make the best medicine. Just listening to her, helped me put a lot of stuff in perspective. Loved ones die. Some things don't get done. Sad days come and go but things do get better. After talking to her yesterday, I felt a whole lot better.

Reach out and reconnect with someone you haven't seen or heard from...in years.
Laugh with them as you reminisce and I guarantee, your day will be better after doing so.
Blessings,
Melodie

Moving Forward

It is amazing when God pushes you in the back and tells you to move on. He has been pushing really hard in my life recently. As I face a new day, I see my to-do list and immediately I am overwhelmed because I am a master procrastinator. I view everything that needs to get done in my life and I often want to put my head under a blanket and hide. But God said...not so.


I recently shared with some dear friends, that I haven't even grieved my father's passing. We won't even mention that Britt continues to drop in my spirit and the memories continue to flood my heart and my mind. I have two book proposals that need tweaking; I have a few church ministries to oversee; a summer schedule that I need to coordinate with my boys and some day trips that I need to muster up for me and my Mom. Did I forget to mention that my bedroom needs cleaning and my office is a disaster? We will just add them to the list...


But God reminded me that I have to move forward. Stop dwelling on the to-do list that never quite gets done. I need to wake up each morning with a plan and execute it with the tenacity and courage. By doing so, it will push me toward my daily goals as I force those areas of doubt and being overburdened to be placed under my feet.


Moving forward takes that strength to let some things go. If I need to I'll hire some folk to help. I'll do those things that only I can do...like spend some precious moments with my 87 year old Mom.


Moving forward will force me to choose those things that are doable and drop those things that waste my time. (I do have a sixteen year old and a ten year old that can help with the bedroom clean up. There is no need to stress over that...)


God, in His awesomeness, will help me if I let him. He will direct me to those paths that He wants me to travel. He will equip me with whatever I need when I get to where he wants me to go.


Moving forward means leaving some things (and some people) behind even when you see them as a crutch that you have leaned on for awhile. Let those things (and/or people) go and move forward with faith.


Scripture states that I need to press toward the mark for the prize of the high calling of God in Christ Jesus. That alone seems overwhelming. But that is exactly what I am going to do. Moving forward, placing one foot in front of the other, standing in faith and covered in prayer.


But first, I need to clean up my office...

Just A Few Simple Words...

My Dad died three weeks ago. It was the strangest thing. I took him to the hospital, only because I was concerned about his not eating. He had lost interest in food and it was a struggle to get him to eat like he should. But each day, we would coax him to eat a little of this and a little of that. I was so concerned that I took him to the doctor.

"We have to get you to eat, Mr. Powell", the doctor shouted since Dad refused to wear his hearing aids. So in the hospital he went, only to be told that he was fine, just old. He charmed the nurses with his wit and his songs. He sang for everyone who was willing to listen.

Dad came home and began to sleep - all day and all night. I know that it was a sign. But a sign that I REFUSED to accept.

Then Dad started to wet through his clothes. Another sign...but I pretended that it was just another accident.

Then Dad decided that he not only wanted to sleep all the time but now he refused to walk.

Another sign, but my thought was, the man is 91 and if he is tired - he is tired.

But when he didn't get up from his nap and I had to spoon feed him his dinner well, I just thought he was recouperating from the UTI that they found while we were in the hospital.

But God had other plans. My Dad was dying...

Unlike the days and months before, my Dad laid down, went to sleep and woke up in glory.

The strangest thing was, grief didn't overwhelm me this time. I miss him, yes, but my Dad had a full life of baseball, women, friendship, laughter and song. And at age 70, he accepted the Lord as his personal Savior. What more could you have asked for?

So there was acceptance on my part. My Dad was gone after a life that was later filled with a intense love for the Word of God, gospel music and family.

BUT all I could remember were just a few simple words that he graced my life with over my 47 years.

Words like, "I love you", "you're just the sweetest thing" "you're so sweet" and "don't worry about me cause when I leave here, I'm going to be with the Lord". These words he said to me at least once a day for as long as I can remember.

These precious words will keep me as I try to take care of my greiving mother. A woman who loved in spite of betrayal and heartbreak. A woman who stood by her man's side, when she should have divorced him. A woman who is the classic example of a love that is never ending, patient and kind.

Since he passed she wears his watch. When she's not wearing it, she is holding it close. A keepsake, a gentle reminder of a love that stood the test of time of 58 years.

When I will think of him in the days to come, other words will spring to mind. Words like baseball, robin, wallet and hat. These four words came to be such a part of my Dad's daily existence; well, without them, he wouldn't be Dad.

So as we closed the coffin that clear Friday in May, I placed his wallet and his hat in with him. His coffin was adorned with a red breasted robin that was embroidered on the casket's sheath. The robin will always be his moniker, like the song he sung faithfully in the church. It is commonly known as "The Robin Song". And will always be remembered as my Dad's song from hundreds of people that heard him perform it.

These a just a few simple words that will sustain me as I face each day without my Dad. In spite of everything, he loved me. In spite of everything else, he cherished me. For that, I will always be grateful.

Another four words spring to my mind as I close out this post:

I Love You, Daddy.

Ulus Powell May 29, 1917 - May 16, 2009

Any Old Excuse Will Do...

I haven't written since October and I have many excuses. Mom's cancer diagnosis and ongoing recovery, the 2nd anniversary of Britt's death, church work, conferences, the loss of a special friend in our lives, travel and holiday furor are all good reasons to be too busy to write. But none are good enough to bear the weight of me not writing.

I have missed sitting here sharing my heart. I love the process of birthing the words, the sentence structures, the thoughts and incessant ramblings that are always in my head. I guess that is the creative part of me, that is always pushing, always forcing itself to be heard, if only in my imagination.

When I finally take the time to write, I find time to embrace my thoughts, discover new ideas and then try painfully to write it all eloquently. (Hopefully all you readers out there can understand me.) Then I try to get it all down before I lose it all. It's fun but I find myself racing against this clock that is always ticking, forcing me to hurry. Maybe that is why it has been a struggle. But I'm going to put all those distractions away and write anyway.
I hope that you will be there to share this labor of love.
Blessings,
Melodie

Just A Simple Reminder

As I was looking at my blog, I struggled as I considered my blogging options. I must admit, when I see that I haven't written in days, the weight of writer's guilt overwhelms me. I want to do better, but with my schedule and my daily tasks, I am amazed that I remember to take a shower. There are so many things that are in my spirit that I want to share. I can't write them all TODAY, but I recognize the fact that I should write something.

As I struggled, the Holy Spirit sent me a writer's prompt. It was just a simple reminder. It happened so quickly as I was looking over the blog. I glanced at the faith quotes located on the top left of the page. I placed these quotes there to remind us all of the importance of faith. (You can't walk in "Big Shoes" without faith.) With so many famous people having spoken about faith, surely we can gain something that will empower us in our daily walk.

Well today was my day. I love how the Holy Spirit knows just what you need and when you need it. I looked over and there was the quote for Saint Augustine that stated:

Faith is to believe what you do not see;

The REWARD of this faith is to see what you believe.

I'm a minister and I have preached and taught about faith many times over. And yes, I know that this quote from Saint Augustine is just a old ("new") twist on Hebrews 11:1. But isn't it wonderful to know that God sees when you are going through and He sends you a quote from a man who has been dead for over 1700 years to remind you of HIS faithfulness.

I don't know about you but recently I felt as if I was up against a wall. With my mother's recent's diagnosis and upcoming surgery, my physical weariness from doctor's visit's and consultations, the pressures of homelife, church and community, the yo-yo effect of the economy, concerns for friend's prayer requests and my role of caretaker of two wonderful senior citizens, plus this innate desire to write a book and no time to write it, well faith seem to be the furthest thing I can focus on today.

Isn't that like many of you? We tend to focus on what's wrong instead of the "absolute possibility" that God is going to show up. We strategically place God in the "Maybe He will help today" column and instead worry about our cares and frustrations. I know God sometimes looks down during those times and says, "Beloved, where is your faith?" Let's be honest, sometimes it is so hard. It is hard to trust God when it seems like you are alone in this life and nothing is working out. There have been times (especialy when I faced the fact that I had to deal with cancer again and it has only been 20 months since Britt's death) that I wanted to run and get under my heavy blanket and stay there until everything is over.

But let me say this to all of you. God wants us to be adult about the situation. (Don't you hate that?) He wants us to be a faith filled people even when it is hard. He wants us to believe what we don't see. That my sisters and brothers require a mind-set change. We must change the way we look at things. We must change the way we analyze things and yes, we must change the way we react to things. Still the bottom of line is, will we believe that God can get us out of our present dilemma when it looks like He's NOT going to do it today? Can we still be faith filled people? Can we remain is a calm state although that check didn't come today or we didn't get the job?

Can we believe it although we can't see it?

I want to answer for you and say yes! Just believe and before you know it, you will get the reward. Maybe not today. Maybe not at the exact moment you feel like you need it most. But God always shows up when it seems like ALL the chips are down and there is no where to turn. God manifests His grace that empowers us to abound in ALL things... and "all" means ALL.

Believing even when we can't see is hard. Trusting God, when it seems like there is no way out is HARD. Trusting God, when you want to hide is HARD. Trusting God when it seems like those closest to you are the farthest away is HARD.

Hebrews 11:1a says it like this, "Now faith is the substance of things hoped for...

What are you hoping for today? A miracle? A mortgage payment? A rekindled love that been gone for awhile? Maybe it a financial breakthrough or a college tuition payment. The requests are endless but the reward of believing what you don't see now will be the manifestation of seeing what you have believed.

Just let that simmer in your spirit. I wanted to share this simple reminder. Remember there is nothing too hard for God.

Now, can you believe that?

Blessings,

Melodie

Oh That He Would Hide Me

Waiting in the patient's waiting room, I had a case of deja vu. While my mom tried to digest 1000cc of contrast which was faintly disguised as Crystal Light Lemonade, I listened to the sounds around me. As I sat there, I heard a small child in distress, crying hysterically and I just sat there and my eyes burned with tears. I wanted to run and comfort this child who I did not know. This child, was probably afraid, because x-ray rooms can be dark and scary. Yet, I was remembering my own fears as I has waited with Britt years ago. But I wasn't here with her. I was here with my Mom, trying to be a comfort, a place of safety.

But while we waited, I was remembering being in another small room at Duke University Hospital and listening to all the tired sick children cry as they waited for a CT scan. The flashbacks came and danced before my mind and I longed to look across the room and see Britt waiting for her turn. Instead, I remembered where I was and why I was here. I remembered my mother and her cancerous polyp and I thought about the possible results.

Oh that He would hide me in the secret place...

In the 21 months since she has been gone, I've journeyed to new places in faith so the remembering doesn't keep my stomach in knots anymore. Now I worry about Mom losing her balance; Mom being taken care of by tired hospital staff and fretting about Mom being able to withstand the rigors of possible treatment.

Oh that He would hide me in the secret place...

But as I sat there, I simply exhaled and I smile at my Mom. We engage in casual conversation and I want her to know that she is safe. Still she wants to make sure that I am warm and okay. She is always the Mom. But as I confront my own discomfort and the place where I find myself, I simply remember I've done this before. God was with me then and God is with me now. I thought to myself as she glanced at an old National Geographic magazine, when we leave this place, we are going to take the long way home so she can enjoy the trees, the birds and all the different people she sees on the street.

The technician came to get her and off the two of them went. I prayed as they left the room. I sat and read the latest book that I had in my purse. I looked at her contrast and cup and noticed that she had drunk it all. Not a whimper, nor a complaint. She always just did what she had to do. I buried myself in the book and I looked up and there was my Mom and the nice CT technician. She's all through, he said as he brought her walker in front of me. "She's finished?", I asked in astonishment. Well, she wasn't back there 15 minutes. When Britt had a CT she was back there for 45 minutes to an hour sometimes two. I gathered her things, we journeyed to the front of the hospital and I got her in the car.

What this a good thing or a bad thing? But instead of fretting about it, I decided to pray. We journeyed home and Mom and I talked about the change of the season and the beautiful color of the fall leaves. She loves that kind of thing. She talked about trees that I had never heard of and the onset of the fall season. (I tell you, the woman should have been a botanist.) That conversation carried us all the way home where Mom got settled in her routine and I talked to my husband. This time I didn't call my cousin in NY. I decided to wait until we heard something.

Although I walked this walk before, I was going to trust God to bring Mommy out. No matter how many times I reflected on Britt's journey with cancer, I also knew that Mom was not Britt. Britt was diagnosed with Stage 4 metastatic cancer at the age of twelve. Mom had a cancerous polyp and she was 86 years old. Not the same scenario.

While we waited on the results in the days that followed, I began to pray for Mom's health more and more. Thanking God for his hedge of protection around her, I rested and worked on church work. God is so faithful and as I allowed him to hide me, I could wait in peace. In the secret place, God will hide me from the fear, the anxiety and the pain of waiting, knowing that no matter what the technician saw on the scan God would be with my Mom all the way. I'm learning to trust Him more and more even when I don't know how things are going to end up.

Oh that He would hide me in the secret place...

As I walk this uncertain journey, let me admonish you to trust Him even when you don't know how things are going to end up. Exhale and let the pressure escape and learn to rest in Him. He is the only person that can solve your issue and concern. Learn to turn things over to Him and just go along for the ride. But while you are riding along with the cares of this world, don't forget to look out the window and enjoy the scenery. Take on the beauty of God and all that He has created and rest in that. God will allow you to enjoy some things even when you are on one of your harrowing journeys. So hide in His creation and His love for you. Hide in the fact that He is there with you.

It doesn't get any better than that.

Blessings,

Melodie

The Doctor's Visit

On a recent doctor's visit, my mom's platelet count was found to be extremely high. Of course, when Britt was sick, I monitored her counts on a daily basis. I knew a high (or low) count was nothing to fool around with. I immediately became concerned. My Mom has always been the calm, stoic one who never allowed anything ruffle her feathers. So when her doctor suggested a colonoscopy, she didn't flinch.

I sat there in shock but quicky got myself together. After several more doctors and visits to their offices, the day of the colonoscopy had arrived. I was assured by the nurses that she would be back from the procedure in 30-45 minutes. Reading old magazines, listening to CNN didn't calm my nerves. It wasn't that I hadn't sat in a treatment waiting room a thousand times before, nor was I not use to procedures taking longer that stated. But as I sat there those 45 minutes became three hours. My poor mommy!

Finally I was ushered back to an exhausted doctor, who had laid out a collection of pictures for me to see. His concern was just with one. There staring back at us was an ugly polyp, who refused to come out completely. "I couldn't get it all. You see where I stained it? That is where we are going to have to go back. She's been back there for almost three hours. " He suggested another colonoscopy in four to six weeks. I met my mother back in the pre-treatment room and there she sat, with not a worry or concern. We packed up and traveled home after a quick stop at Starbucks. Of course, the enemy began to speak to me and I immediately began to pray and confess the Word of God over my mother's health. As I drove, I glanced over as my mother nodded off and on. I prayed as she slept that God would give me the strength to support her and keep her encouraged.

We waited for a few days and around 5:30, we got the dreaded phone call. My mom's doctor, trying to sound as supportive as he could, let us know that the polyp that he removed was cancerous. My heart dropped to the floor and it seemed like by breath had stopped. I glanced over at my mom as she sat in the family room folding laundry. How was I going to tell her? Knowing how she worried, I knew that this news would keep her up at night. Lord Jesus, how do I tell her? When do I tell her? I ran up to the guest room and prayed. Then I sat there and remembered Britt's struggle, her battles with chemo and her willingness to fight. She got it from somewhere and I knew that her strength came from my mother. Some admire me because of my own strength, but like Britt, I stand as resilently as I can because of what my mother gave to me. So I must assume, she would be strong enough to handle whatever news I gave her. But I didn't want her to to worry that day or the immediate days to come so I didn't tell her. I called my cousin (a doctor in NY) and I shared all the details. She counseled me and agreed with me that a few day wouldn't matter.

Instead, I prayed more and trusted God. And I loved my mother with things she loved to do, like getting her hair done and going to Shomars and buying her favorite fish sandwich. As I allowed the days to pass, I would watch my mother and would just become full. Brittany and now my mother...God help me! But instead of crying and getting depressed, I committed my mornings to a more intimate time in prayer for my mother, my family, our ministry and God's plan for our life. I had to lay all of those issues at the feet of Jesus. There I would lay my burden down of worry and concern and trust God to take care of everything. With that realization and acceptance, I decided to let God handle it. For he promised that He would never leave me nor forsake me. And as the days passed by, I knew that He would handle everything. With that acknowledgement, I exhaled.

Pushing, Pressing and Praying Through - A Choice We Have To Make

Every challenge that confronts me has the opportunity to impact my life in a positive or negative way. In times past, I would allow the pressure to overwhelm me, consume me, distract me. But with growth and God's grace, I now realize that I have a choice to make. Every person who reads this blog can make the same choice. We must all ask ourselves, how am I going to allow this event to influence my life? The question is pretty simple; yet we in our complex lives, complicates matters with complex solutions. Not me, well, not anymore. I've learned that the pressures of living, the accidental circumstances, the happenstances, the coincidences can take me over the edge if I allow it. But not me.

I look back and I realize that when I lost my daughter I had a choice.. The grief was so powerful, so consuming that I allowed it to drop me into an abyss that I recently climbed out of...it was a scary journey. Although I invited God in, I wouldn't consider allowing him to bring me out. He in His infinite grace and mercy, allowed me to stay there; but He quietly stayed by my side, insuring me of my safety and sanity. Yet, I had a choice to make. I made a quality decision and that decision was life changing. I made a choice to live. I pushed myself to get up each morning and mother my sons. I could have stayed in the bed and cried and lamented, but instead I did things a mother is supposed to do; love my sons, feed my sons, help with their laundry, encourage them over homework and just be there to let them know how important they were to me. I could have easily ignored them, instead I pressed through the hurt and loved them. I could have allowed my grief to overshadow the fact, that I still had two sons to love and raise. But instead, I chose to do what was best for them.

Even with that lesson learned, I continue to face many challenges. The pressure of ministry often made me yearn to go on sabbatical and stay away for an extended period of time. But God told me, you can't run from the pressures of responsibility no matter how difficult it becomes. You must face each challenge, knowing that God has your back. The blessed thing is if you love God, (and you know that He loves you) God is going to bring you through each challenge anyway. And still I struggle with the fact that God is not just a God over problems but He wants to direct you each day which each step that you make. The question is, will you allow Him to do that in your life? And if you say, yes, remember that you can't allow confusion to cloud your judgement. He wants to instruct you in the way that you should go. Still, we all have a choice to make. Will we let him in?

So what choice do I make? I'm going to trust Him to carry me. But while I am trusting him, I'm going to push through the circumstances of life. I'm going to push through the maze that clouds my direction. I'm going to push through the pressure of having to perform; I'm going to push past the questions that confront me. Questions, like, what about the book? What about the company? What about the plan and what about the dream? All these question, only God has the answers. So why shouldn't I push through until he tells me what He wants me to do.

What is the other choice that I must make? I've got to press through the confusion, the worry and the doubt and trust God to give me clear insight and direction. Pressing through pain and discouragement, can distract you...if you allow it. Sometimes the pain is so great; even as you press through, it tries to take your breath away. Often times, pressing through means allowing yourself to exhale. And I mean that literally. Just taking a deep breathe and breathing out, allows the body to destress and relax. But we must decide to PRESS!!!! Press through all the things that wants to take you in the wrong direction.

Most importantly, we must pray through every situation that we confront. God impressed upon my heart to take my intercession to another level. Isn't it funny, how often we stop praying when we are confronting the most pain? Well, God told me, the things that I want from Him will never come if I don't go to the next level in prayer. Well, I've never prayed so intensely as I have prayed these past months. The blessing is, I have seen a tremendous blessing in my walk with Him. The vision that God has given me is clearer and I have detailed instructions on what to do to make them come to pass. But this would have never happened, if I would not have taken my prayer life to another level. And praying is WORK! Yes, it is sweet communion with God and it is a great time of fellowship with him, but readers, if you want to tear down some serious strongholds, it is warfare. And warfare is WORK through prayer.

Had I chosen not to participate and not pray...well things would be a lot worse. Had I chosen not to press through the issues of life, I bet you I would have had a nervous breakdown by now. And had I not chosen to push through my grief I would probably have died six months ago.

But God gives us choices. And I am so grateful that He was there to help me make the right one. I decided, instead of succumbing to the pressure, I'm pushing through it with faith. I pressing on with power and I'm staying on my knees in prayer asking God to be a part of it all.

Who am I kidding? I couldn't have handled it on my own anyway.
Blessings,
Melodie

A Rite of Passage

He did it. I can't believe it but he finally did it. My son, on the first try, passed the exam for his driver's permit. He didn't miss any on the sign test and just a few on the exam. I'm proud but now he's going to expect to drive everyday. I hate to tell him that driving is a priviledge that is earned. It is not an entitlement. Although, we could use another driver as busy as our schedules are.

But do you know what is amazing? He studied for the driver's exam and I mean studied. He really wants to drive. Isn't it amazing how much our kids put into a task, when it benefits them?

I just wish he would embrace homework that way. At fifteen, he can't see the value or the benefit of homework or studying hard. Being a smart kid, he feels that if he does enough to get by, that should be sufficient. Well, I think I already wrote about Mommy's School. Well, school commences this Thursday. We are spending the afternoon in the library preparing for the PSAT. He doesn't feel like it is needed. "Isn't it a test that sees how much I know?" "It doesn't matter about that test. I don't need it." All lame excuses for not wanting to take studying seriously. (I've got a lot of work to do!)

With the death of their sister, I have been lenient to the point that I have not challenged their intellect. I don't know... both boys are very intelligent. They have done well. But I didn't push the homework like I should. Both boys are honor roll students so I didn't feel like they needed the challenge. I felt that they needed time to adjust, recover and deal with the loss. (Let's be honest, I needed to deal with the loss and grieve myself. ) So I didn't push it. Well, it has been nearly 21 months since Britt's death and my boys are getting older. If I don't start training them now, it is going to be very difficult to do it in the future. (And no, it is not too late for my fifteen year old. Difficult, maybe. Too late, never.)

My fifteen old now looks at me like I am crazy because now I am starting to push those buttons. I expect him to deliver. It is very challenging but I know the value of taking school seriously. He will go far if he does well. It is my responsiblity to make sure that he does everything he needs to do, to be prepared and focused. So I'm ready for the challenge. And he will be too.

But would someone PLEASE pray for me?! Homework now includes driving practice.

A Bona Fide Member of the Sandwich Generation

The sandwich generation has been defined as those adults who are raising kids and taking care of their elderly parents all at the same time. Well, that is definitely me. These last few weeks have been tough. I've been busy working on our condensed Women's Season at our church. My husband celebrated his 51st birthday on the 4th. Some members of the church threw him a beautiful celebration with a sit down dinner and we were impressed. It was a wonderful church event. The family party is this weekend. My husband's siblings will be in town. It will be a great weekend, filled with great food (I can't wait!), fellowship and family fun.
My boys are back in school. I'm relieved but worried, because this is the season that I must really begin my serious training sessions for my 15 year old. (I'm way behind in this department). He's brilliant, but lazy and hates to read. Well, he's going to start "Mommy's School" since he never seems to have home work. I know that it will be a major transition for him. Both boys treat our home like a five star resort. They each have their favorite space and life is just wonderful. My fifteen year old is on the computer, wishing for his dream car. I've seen every model imaginable and I just have to sigh and smile. I don't know where he got the idea that we were going to buy him a $30,000-$40,000 luxury sports car. I know, I know. The Driver's Ed class was passed and now he's just waiting for Mommy to take him to the DMV. Then we have to get the car. I want to tell him so bad, "until we find you a nice used model, you'll be driving Mommy's minivan". He'll be heartbroken but he's got to learn that if he wants nice things he going to have to work for them. And working to me, is doing things around the house without being asked. Now that is going to be the struggle. We've decided to get him a small "hooptee". This is synonymous to a seven to ten year old car with about 45,000 miles on it. Like I said, he will be heartbroken but he will get over it. He's bargaining and bartering. "I'll work and get the down payment", he suggests. I just laugh. It's hard for him to vacuum without him justifying why he doesn't want to do it right now. "If you get me my car, then I will..." Well the list goes on and on. He'll do a lot of things for the car. And he wants to get a job where you actually have to work. (Does he think, I think he is going to actually do that ?) I just want him to do things because I have asked him to. You know, obedience and submission. Hence, Mommy school. It won't be fun, but I guarantee he'll be better for it.

Then there is Bryson, my 10 year old. Smart as a whip but is passionate about CARTOONS and the Disney Channel. This boy has clocked more hours in front of the TV than I have reading my Bible. Since he is so smart, he does his homework in about twenty minutes. And his favorite reply is, "Mom, I read at school". And off to my bedroom where he has the full use of our master bedroom suite. He calls it his personal lounge. Well, I fooled him. With school in the second week, he went to the condensed version of Mommy School. I signed him up for the school's Afterschool Enrichment Program. I was never so glad as I was when I gave them my $150 registration fee and gladly paid for the month of September at $200 a pop!!! We'll he's running, jumping, sweating, doing his homework, reading and he gets home just in time for dinner. Then he has a short TV time and then he is off for a shower and bed time. (Well, I couldn't take it away completely. An hour or so of TV is a lot better than four hours of watching TV.) During the summer I started him reading "Black Boy" by Richard Wright. Since I read this in undergrad, I'm wasn't pressing him to read a 384 page novel during his summer vacation. Like I said, he's only ten. But he seems to be enjoying it and he is still waddling through Part I: Southern Night, as we journey into September. So when he has nothing to do or proclaims that he is bored, I direct him to the novel and he quickly finds something to do after about 30 minutes of reading. Mommy School...it is a wonderful thing.

Then there are my parents. I love them so much but they are my children as well. (At least, that is how I feel sometimes.) My father loves the fact that I have to wait on him hand and foot. My husband calls me "the new wife" since my Mom has relegated all of his demands to me. Of course, I just smile a lot and say "yes, Daddy". But I want to scream when he doesn't want to finish his meal or gets chewing gum on my new sofa. And when he gets it all over his pajamas (that now need to be thrown away) I just want to cry. Especially when he looks me dead in my eyes and swears that he didn't do it. He blames my mother. She is the one that got chewing gum on his pajamas. I worry about him getting enough nutrients. He doesn't have a good appetite anymore and we are buying Ensure by the case. But his days are filled with reading the newspaper and he is content watching the Price is Right and Wheel of Fortune. For a 91 year old, life has never been so good. My mom is precious. At 86, she wants to do things around the house and I have to put my foot down and say no (very respectfully, of course.) I was in a worried state because I was afraid that she had cancer. We have been going back and forth to the doctor for the past three weeks and praise be to God - no cancer. But like one doctor said, "you don't have a problem, Ms. Key, but you do have an issue." For now we will watch her and get her blood checked every two weeks. We're trying to get her to gain some weight. We have another doctor's visit tomorrow to check more into that. Malabsorption, they say. Maybe she is allergic to gluten. We don't know, but I worry and I pray.

As a minister I know that we are to "trust in the Lord with all our heart and lean not to our own understanding". But when it is your parents and it is your responsibility to take care of them, sometimes you can't help it. So each day, I make sure they are fed, clean, have had their meds and are enjoying a lot of sunshine and of course the CBS soaps and the game shows. My boys are wonderful and will graduate from Mommy School. And yes, they will grow up to be awesome men of God who have successful lives and bright futures. And yes, our marriage is wonderful and we enjoy working together and sharing in this thing called ministry.

Life is somewhat harried, but I'm learning how to deal with it with less pressure and better insight. I'm prioritizing and honing my organizational skills. I've learned what my limits are and now am not afraid to say "No" when I need to.

Yes, I am a bona fide member of the sandwich generation and learning from each bite of it.

Will We Stand Up and Vote?

Since the 2008 Presidential Primary, I have been amazed at the atmosphere in the political arena. Pundits are so vindictive that candidates (and even viewers) could threaten a lawsuit. They are so busy calling names, sharing their perception of candidates' weaknesses, insinuating their lack of leadership that we lose focus on the important issues. I just want a truthful presentation of a honest candidate whose heart is filled with compassion for our country and the people who live in it.

No one likes to wear their politics on their sleeves. Well, there are some, but I have heard that it is so unethical to do so. When it comes to religion and politics, we are taught to keep our views on the "DL", (down low) because we don't want to offend. If we talk about Jesus, someone might get offended. If we share our views on political candidates someone might get offended and not like us anymore. Many are questioning this country's ability to be lead by an African American man. Even on MSNBC this week, a pundit was bold enough to declare, "this is a race issue". Sadly, I must agree.

I don't know. With everything our country has been through with Watergate, the hostage crisis, the Iran-Contra Affair, Whitewater, the Monica Lewinsky scandal, 9/11, and all the other "gates" I can't recall, I'm ready for something and someone different. I'm ready for leadership that is solid and focus. I'm ready to be lead by a man who is sincere when he shows his wife affection and doesn't care who writes about it. I'm ready to lead by a man who has a solid foundation in Christ (and no, it doesn't matter to me who is Pastor use to be). And yes, I'm even ready to lead by a man who doesn't have all the answers but he won't be ashamed to ask for help.

There are so many issues that we face as a country. Is there anyone out there who is willing to take a stand and a risk? Are you watching the news? Do you see what is going on in our country? And could someone please tell me when our troops are coming home?

I don't know, with gas at an all time high and grocery store receipts getting more outrageous, I want to shout and tell everyone to stand up! With families losing their homes by the hundred of thousands and folks losing their jobs, somebody better get concerned. With New Orleans still in a state of devastation, it seems like they all have been forgotten. Someone needs to pray and lead. With political leaders more concerned about their image and how they are perceived, no wonder we are in the state that we are in. Would someone please get concerned about the family who can't meet their bills? Would someone please get involved with the lady whose husband is abusing her? Would someone please get concerned about the family who is going to lose their home in the next 45 days? Would someone cook dinner for the solider who just returned home because he lost his leg in Iraq and his family is in a state of shock?

With all these issues our country is facing, would someone please stand up and VOTE this November? Take the biggest risk in your life and vote. We need CHANGE like we never needed it before.

The Power of Lasting Friendship

Do you know the importance of a lasting friendship? And when I type "lasting", I'm not talking about a friend that you met four years ago at the local church, PTA or neighborhood watch meeting. Those friends are wonderful to have. Don't get me wrong. It is a blessing when the Lord gives you a friend especially when you haven't had a good one in a long time. Someone to share with, laugh with and hang out with at the local mall. But this type of friendship is different. I'm talking about a friend that you have had over 10, 15 or 25 years. The type of friend that walks with you through heartache, divorce or great loss. This type of friend knows all your idiosyncrasies and loves you anyway. A friend who knows your greatest fears yet strives to push you to your greatest level. I'm blessed. I have some wonderful friends that I've know for over twenty -five years. But I'm not even talking about them. (If you are reading this blog entry...I love you, I really do!)

No, I'm talking about these friends. These three women (they're sisters) are my oldest friends. Meet Caroline, (me), Kelly and Chris. I met Kelly when I was three or four years old. I could have been younger. One of my youngest memories is of me crying because Kellie had to report to school on the first day. I couldn't tag along. I wasn't old enough to go to school. I think I was four. I was heartbroken. I remember it like it was yesterday. All I know is I have known her my entire life. Kelly has been my best friend for over forty years. When baby sister Caroline, could walk independently, she tagged along on all of our adventures whether we wanted her to or not. She was a constant reminder that she was a part of us too. And we didn't really appreciate Chris until we got a little bit older. She liked to boss us around but she could play a mean hands of jacks.

We were a part of the "Hartley Hill Gang". The title, we gave to ourselves. It's the street we lived on some 40 years ago. And surprisingly, there were more of us. Richie, Toni, Zep, Terry, Mary Gail, Linda, Lou Ellen and Wilma all were a part of those childhood memories. During elementary and middle school we had pageants, fashion shows, singing contests and boy, could we play church. We hiked hours in the woods and scoured the neighborhood for apple trees. We ate them green and raw.

Remembering those summer nights of "One, Two, Three Red Light", "Red Rover", "Hide and Seek" only brought back fonder memories of summer days of softball, kickball and tag. Choir rehearsal, Vacation Bible School (VBS) and days up at the Rec filled our summer days with Jesus, Bible verses and days on the swings . I'll never forget when there was going to be an eclipse. We all believed that it was the end of the world. Did we panic? No! We gathered on the softball field, joined hands and prayed for God's divine intervention!!!!

During high school, we went to Chris' basketball games, I marched in the band and Kellie cheered at the football games. We went on triple dates, hung out at Broyhill Park and spent summer days at Lake James. (Caroline wasn't old enough and we FINALLY got to leave her at home.) But those days we were home, we spent hours reading Harlequin Romances, Silhouette Desires and listened to R&B. We danced, joked and laughed until our sides would ache and tears streamed down our faces. We did everything together. We got our ears pierced...together. We went to the pool...together. We shared cookies and peach sodas from their Grandfather's store...together. One day, we decided to play with matches and we inadvertently set the woods on fire. The fire trucks came and of course, they blamed me. Didn't we do everything TOGETHER?! No, we did not get a spanking together...only me. (I'm still upset about it!)

Yet, here we are together again. Last weekend, some 40 plus years later, we celebrated Chris and her husband, LeChone's 18 year Recommitment Ceremony. (Isn't she beautiful?) We laughed and cried. Chris cried through the entire ceremony. When she wasn't crying, she was laughing. It was the funniest thing. Kelly, Caroline and I tried to be adult and not fall on the floor from laughing. (By the way, we use to be terrible in church. We would laugh at the Mothers of the church who sang off key and we tried our best not to pee on ourselves...literally. But remember, we were only 9, 12, and 13.) Yet, here we were in Havelock, NC all grown up, acting like three young school girls, laughing at the most inappropriate time and I was remembering yesterday.

Yes, these are my oldest and dearest friends. We finish each other's sentences. We know what the other is thinking and can quickly state it better than the other. We have loved and supported each other through the death of their young mother, their father and my daughter. We endured parental alcoholism, a family shooting and high school heartbreak (three of us...well, Kelly would say two of us). Oh, the ties that bind. We have been in each other's weddings and supported two through divorce, one during the death of a fiance and loved one through some difficult personal trials. They love my parents as if they were their own and we share the love for our children. Still, on last weekend, (although it was Chris's day), it was still about us. The Hartley Hill Gang, sharing yet another milestone in the life of one another. As we stood taking this picture, I couldn't help but reminisce about the days in the apple trees and playing kickball on the Hill. It is amazing how God can bless you with this much love through the power of friendship. He intricately entwined our lives together that even when we are a part, we are still together.

As we loaded up the car to leave the hotel, I hugged Kelly and Caroline with tears threatening to stream down my face. These were my friends, (I would even say, my sisters), who will always be a part of me. I look back over my own life and I realize that I would not be the woman I am today had these women not been in my life. I don't think I could have made it this far without them.

So to you, I say, treasure that old friend. Call them up, reminisce and talk about "the old days". Share those powerful stories and great adventures that made you laugh and cry.

But try not to pee in your pants.

Blessings,

Melodie